When you buy something online these days, you often have to “sign” some sort of contract. To play an online game you have to sell your soul. There are now pieces of our soul out there somewhere. Who knows how many stipulations we have agreed to just to play a game. I don’t read the fine print. I scroll down and hit “agree” and move on. Contracts are everywhere. But, covenants are rare.
Covenants are very different from contracts. The most common covenant we experience in our culture is the marriage covenant. We enter a marriage covenant understanding that there are many unknowns. The future is uncertain and yet it is a binding covenant entered into by two parties.
The problem we face as a culture is that we treat marriage like a contract. We treat it as a piece of paper, a legal agreement. And yes, at a wedding there is a legal document, but a marriage is so much more than a legal piece of paper. It is a covenant.
Covenants are made before God. Covenants are initiated for the benefit of the other person not for self-protection. Covenants are made with promises that are unconditional, based on steadfast love. Covenants view commitment as permanent. Covenant marriage is God’s plan.
At the next wedding you attend, watch for the covenant aspects on display. If done correctly, they will be obvious. We just don’t think about it very often. There is God. There are two families. There are many guests who gather to bless and support the formation of a new family. It is a special moment, and we dress accordingly. Everyone is a witness to this transaction, even though only five people sign the legal document.
And the best part of the entire event? The vows. All the hoopla fades away. The couple, if done properly, gaze only into each other’s eyes and make promises, they make a covenant. The traditional vows are usually best, because sometimes couples write their own and leave out all the good stuff – the stuff that is going to make a marriage thrive.
The beauty of a wedding, at its core, is that families and friends gather to participate in making this covenant. The fingerprints of covenant are everywhere. In our secular world we can make it about something quite different. Shame on us.
I marvel at how unique the covenant of marriage is in our world. It is hardly the contract we flippantly “agree” to – just to use the operating system on our computer. And weddings are not simply tradition, they are packed with meaning.
A Christian marriage models the covenant God has made with us. He did not make a contract. He made a covenant. Think about it.